she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
