the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm sobbing to NWA
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
