He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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