we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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