Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...

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(713): I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way... http://tfl.nu/0604

Replies (12) Good night (873) Bad night (1502)
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(561): View more from Florida

I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.

(561): View more from Florida

He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.

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(561): I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class. (561): He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it. http://tfl.nu/mjkl

Replies (18) Good night (6455) Bad night (1393)
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(778): View more from British Columbia

There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater

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(778): There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater http://tfl.nu/g5ze

Replies (4) Good night (919) Bad night (2500)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday

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(419): I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday http://tfl.nu/dtfw

Replies (8) Good night (3795) Bad night (1009)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.

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(978): My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me. http://tfl.nu/a4fn

Replies (6) Good night (2518) Bad night (708)
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(530): View more from California

My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans

(530): View more from California

You've been usurped as King of the Gays

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(530): My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans (530): You've been usurped as King of the Gays http://tfl.nu/3bmd

Replies (19) Good night (1937) Bad night (824)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.

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(508): Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess. http://tfl.nu/kvya

Replies (7) Good night (1872) Bad night (638)
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(812): View more from Indiana

Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.

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(812): Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome. http://tfl.nu/9uj2

Replies (9) Good night (1649) Bad night (670)
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(208): View more from Idaho

Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often

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(208): Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often http://tfl.nu/tod9

Replies (3) Good night (1267) Bad night (453)
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(563): View more from Iowa

I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast

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(563): I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast http://tfl.nu/ae47

Replies (2) Good night (968) Bad night (439)
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(562): View more from California

New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.

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(562): New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches. http://tfl.nu/v2w2

Replies (9) Good night (902) Bad night (502)
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(731): View more from Tennessee

He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me

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(731): He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me http://tfl.nu/hoyn

Replies (6) Good night (1108) Bad night (439)
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(770): View more from Georgia

Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck

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(770): Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck http://tfl.nu/dtrp

Replies (4) Good night (526) Bad night (327)
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(949): View more from California

Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro

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(949): Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro http://tfl.nu/aiuo

Replies (0) Good night (448) Bad night (272)
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(706): View more from Georgia

We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.

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(706): We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart. http://tfl.nu/025s

Replies (0) Good night (324) Bad night (131)

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