Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
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