he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
