this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
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We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
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My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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