I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
being pregnant is like rehab
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize