What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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