I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
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Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
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It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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