We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
