What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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