We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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