went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Buhtt sex?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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