THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
