If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Randomize