So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
