Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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