the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
