I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
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My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
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Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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