i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Randomize
