they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
