She said her name was "party"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
