You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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