Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
