actually, I'm a sock model
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
why do cheetos always look like penises
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I believe in your delicious
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