I feel like I'm in dance class right now
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize