I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
