Yo dont text me then not text me
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
