Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Randomize
