Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
