By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize