Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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