we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Randomize
