I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
