my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
The Olympian is in my bed
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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