I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
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