i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize