Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize