i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize