Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize