piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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