This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Randomize