im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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