honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
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