I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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