Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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