She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
