forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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